Everyone will go through different phases in life just as our marriages will. There will be times when all will be well and there will be times when it just looks like there is nothing to look forward to in the marriage anymore. It does not have to be like that. Sometimes, we let very simple things that should not affect our marriages begin to affect our marriages.
It is possible that you are having a hard time in your personal life. Maybe your husband’s work is not going smoothly or his business is not picking up as smoothly as it should. Somewhere along the long you may stop hoping on the job or business for him and start relating with him based on his inability to provide as you expect.
In some cases it could be the woman who has issues either in her personal life or even at work. For this, the husband may become impatient and start flipping out at every opportunity to do so. It could also be a prolonged health challenge that seems to have drained all your finances and the woman is still not getting better. A man may switch from his compassion to anger.
I honestly don’t know what you are going through and I can’t possibly guess what everyone is going through. But the point here is that sometimes, while dealing with the hard issues in our lives, we unconsciously allow our marriages to suffer. We expect the other partner to understand what we are going through. The truth is that the partner may understand but when we begin to stretch it too much the partner can be worn out.
Always remember that whatever you are going through will come and will go. By the time those hard times are gone, your marriage will still be there. It is possible that your marriage has become weaker or it has become stronger. Issues of life can shake us. We sometimes may not have any idea what to do or where to go. We may just be stranded for a while but when all of this is going on, you need to comfort of your partner. You need the bosom of your partner.
Rather than allowing the challenges to tear you apart, you should ensure that the challenges are getting you closer. It does not even mean that your spouse will totally understand what you are going through. It does help if they understand what you are going through but the more important thing is for them to be there for you in the hard times. If you are there for each other in the hard times, the two of you will still be standing after the hard times.
Take a look at what you have gone through in the past and what you are going through right now. Ask yourself a question. If I continue this way, will my marriage survive future hard times? Or will my marriage be shaking or be broken after future hard times?
I am sure you married that man or woman because you love him or her so much. You want to be together for the rest of your lives and you said all those sweet things to yourselves. Now is the time to understand that it is easier said than done but if you can do it then you will definitely enjoy it.
Bear in mind those hard times will always come in different phases of life. When they come and go, will your marriage be standing?
Fola Daniel Adelesi
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