It was valentine’s day yesterday and I tried to give my wife a little treat. I had started the treat some days back with gifts and finally did the last one on the d-day. After a while I called a few other men, wished them happy valentine’s day and asked if they gave their wives any special treat. Interestingly, all the people I called did not. One said they always had their valentine everyday – just an excuse – while another said he was working all through the day. Someone even gave the impression that he has gone past that stage and it was now for us – referring to me and other young couples. He also hung on to the fact that the wife was not around.
Earlier in the day I had seen a friend’s special calendar with the date ’14’ missing on the calendar. That was a picture on his blackberry messenger. I was forced to ask him why his special calendar had 13 and then 15 instead of 14 being in between. He told me 14 does not exist on his own calendar. I initially teased him about trying to run away from a lady or the possible commitment of giving someone a special treat. He made me realize it was none of that. He was going to bring the religious aspect up and how valentine’s day was possibly linked to sin in one way or the other. As much as I am gifted with talking, there are some things I don’t talk about.
I was not going to start a religious debate or debate the validity of valentine’s day. For me, it is not even about St. Valentine who was said to have done certain things that people would want to remember. I know it is about remembering his acts but today, it now goes beyond that. We have workers day, children’s day, world AIDS day, malaria day, human rights day, father’s day, mother’s day and so many other days. What then is wrong with having a special day to celebrate the loved ones in your life?
For a man, it could be that special day to say thank you to your wife for how she has been taking good care of the family, including you. For the wife, it could be a great day to thank your husband for being the bread winner or for sticking his neck out for the family. I must also say that you don’t have to wait till once a year to do these but having a special day to celebrate love seems like a great idea. All our lives revolve around love from the time we were born to the time we will go six feet below the earth.
Sometimes when I remember that I may not have been perfect but this great woman has put up with me, I want to appreciate her for that. As I said earlier, I don’t wait till February 14 but to have a date set aside just makes it special. I already told all those men who gave one excuse or the other to redeem their images by today or tomorrow or they would be seen as sinners and wicked men – my own thoughts. Forgive me if that sounds harsh.
We also know that love makes the world go round. God is love and He also expects us to love other people even as we love ourselves. It is therefore not about the validity of valentine’s day. It is about appreciating love the right way. Even if some people seems to be doing it the wrong way, we can do it the right. That a thief is driving a car does not make it wrong for me to drive a car! All I need to do is to make sure that my own car is not a stolen vehicle!
Please put away all your sentiments and religious veils. Don’t tell me you celebrate valentine everyday. Stop that trash. Just do something, no matter how little, to appreciate the loved ones in your life! If no one showed you love since you were born, you would be dead by now. If everyone denies you love now that you are grown, you will be too frustrated to live on this earth. Go and show some love!
Fola Daniel Adelesi
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